Personal Issues

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Are you psychologically disturbed? I could just be suffering from some dire psychological affliction such as Munchausen's Syndrome. Perhaps I invented everything because I was 'in denial' about my humble origins. The trouble with that theory is that I am colourful and interesting as I stand; I do not need a made up biography. There are no gaps in my story, and I have not shifted my ground in over sixty years. When others impugned my honour, I dared them to a public battle of magic. They went deaf and did not reply.

Are your motives altruistic? Nothing as simple as that. I am following orders and doing what I have to do. Bookshops, magazines and emails come into the equation. I am concerned with supernatural power and I deal with the Beyond. This is not as creepy as it sounds. We all have a connection with the Beyond, but many are too busy to appreciate the fact.

Could you delve any deeper? That would be a little too ambitious for a book like this. Right here and now I am aiming to answer a mass of preliminary questions; matters that have to be got out of the way before your quest begins. Stuff to do with the Beyond-for example, the nature of God, whether there are angels, and should we dabble in spirit seances-that is best left until you have set out on the path and consolidated your position.

Stop teasing and give us the nitty-gritty. I do not want to impress you or alarm you. When someone enrols as a student of Occultism, I teach them slowly, gradually, taking it step by step. It would be wrong to offer free samples or tasting bits since, taken out of context, you would misunderstand matters and get hold of wrong ideas. At this present moment, I am not engaged in teaching. I have not accepted you on my books. Indeed, you have not asked. All that I am doing is dealing with initial curiosity. If you wish to learn more then you, not I, are the one who will have to delve deeper.

May I have a photograph? Nude or in fancy dress? Sorry, but I am not a film star seeking publicity and I do not have a fan club. Besides, I do not know what else you might do with my photograph, do I? I am not afraid of your doing me magical harm, but of your upsetting my astral Rottweilers. They are difficult to restrain and if anyone should provoke them. Well, what was it Mark Antony said? "Let slip the dogs of war ..." Having said that, I shall expect to receive a photograph of you if ever you apply to be taught by me. I would like to 'read' your character.

Do you expect me to trust you on sight? No. Of course not. However, if you were a dog, you would be able to form a reliable impression quickly. You would go by my smell, I suppose, and you would be able to detect whether I disliked you. A dog presumes that if you dislike dogs then you might well kick him.

Should I be as simple as a dog? Well, there is not much point in preferring people because they are more complex, more cunning, or more devious. Man could learn a great deal from dogs, for example, fidelity, commitment, and love. A dog is ready to die for its Master and although Jesus talked about the supreme kind of selfless love that puts friends first ... most candidates for Occult Studentship tend to be "less superficial" but without necessarily being "profound". Until I meet you, I would not dream of likening you to a dog.

Have you written other books? Yes, and I am a playwright and novelist too, though I use pen-names. As Amado Crowley I have published a book of short stories that mix horror, sex, and magic; and a play of mine was produced in 1994 in London. The purpose of these was to draw attention to my occult writings which I regard as more important.

Are you a cynic? I hope not, but like a doctor in Accident and Emergency, I am shocked by the harm that people do to themselves. As I meet them in the ruins of their lives, it is tempting to chide them. Perhaps we ought to pass a test before they give us a brain. This is all part of the job and I must do it whether I enjoy it or not, and even when nobody thanks me.

Why are you so frank? Yorkshiremen are not renowned for their tact, but why should I walk on eggshells or pussyfoot around? I am old and my days are precious. If you want to make headway, you had best get on with it and stop worrying about social niceties. I do not mean to upset anyone, but I must address the real issues in a direct manner.

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